Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
