So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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