i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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