I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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