come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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