it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
