So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Randomize
