we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Randomize
