I wish life had little blips of pornography
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
