This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
then he tried to convert me to islam
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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