he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize