so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
They have beer where we have blood.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
