Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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