Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Randomize
