weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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