Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize
