i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
The ass gains better be worth it
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