i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Say something about gay babies.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
