I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Randomize
