when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
You ate ashes out of my bong
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