so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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