Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
