Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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