nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
we made out on top of his cat.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
