If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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