last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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