Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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