You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
