Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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