So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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