Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
