do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
