Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
