on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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