Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
