Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
