Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize