How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
babies were throwing up all over the place
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Randomize
