i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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