She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
