I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
