take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
