next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
