did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize