I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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