That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
