so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
