Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
