she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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