I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
so let's talk penis.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Randomize
