he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Just took my morning after pill in the library
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
