You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
